Me personally, I've never used a one-step wax or polish. I love detailing and all the steps in between. You mentioned Turtle wax having abrasives and causing swirls. Most waxes do not contain abrasives, there are some cleaner waxes that contain very mild abrasives though. Usually products containing abrasives are refferred to as compounds or polishes. On this note, abrasives are what actually remove swirls and not cause them as you must remove paint surrounding a swirl/scrath down to the level of the swirl/scratch itself. Swirls are usually caused by dirty towels, car wash brushes, overaggressive compounds not followed up by milder polishes, too much or uneven pressure while drying etc.
It doesn't take a crazy 12 step program for stellar results.

Something like the Mother's 3 step program you mentioned would work well. I would suggest simply wash, clay, polish, and then wax. Take your time and thoroughly complete each of these steps, then follow up with regular washes and wax as water beading abilities dissapate or paint dulls. Also you can use a good quick detailer between waxes. Good luck with everything! [sm=smiley20.gif]