it feels like a dream...this weekend was the most excellent weekend of my life. i went to a friends bday party where we had a huge euchre tournament...then went to winter formal...which was way more fun than i expected. at the beginning of the weekend it was shaping out to be the worst weekend of my life...because i originally couldnt go to the party and Formal was a disaster last year. then...it all turned around and was awesome. but then this morning...my girlfriend called me in tears...sobbing 'kristina calco killed herself last night.' now...kristina wasnt (i hate talking about her in past tense) a girl you would think would be the kind to commit dsuicide...she was always happy and laughing in classes...so you can understand my reaction when i exlaimed 'what?!' just to make sure i didnt mishear her. i raced over to her house...then went to one of our friends house...where i learned more about what had happened...the whole time in a sort of tranceish shock kinda mood...like i was in a nightmare or something. apparently there was more to this than i thought. her boyfriend had dumped her a week or so before...and as it turns out...her parents are..well...less than normal (which suprised me cuz shes one of the preppiest girls i know). i guess for a while she was tlaking to her friends about how her parents favored her sister because her sister was 'less than normal' when all kristina wanted to be was normal as they come. so i guess her parents favored her sister because her sister was taking after them. then she hasnt made varisty cheerleading for two years straight...her friends have been pressuring her to start drinking...and i guess she couldnt take it anymore. her sister found her...im not exactly sure othe specifics...the police are holding them from us...but we know she wrote a 4 page suicide note...explaining why and apologizing to all her friends. of course..the police wont let us know why or who was included in the note (bastards). well...as i said...last night was winter formal. apparently she was talking all week about how she wasnt going to go. but i guess at the last minute...her mom took her out...got her a dress...and took her to formal. before kristina walked inside, she asked her mom 'how do i look?' her mom responded 'you look good,' to which she said 'just good? not beautiful?' and walked away. then everyone said that at formal she was hugging all her friends and anything...which isnt like her. but everyone hugs at formal...so nobody thought much about it. then...according to her mom...when she got home...the last thing her mom said to her was 'dont forget to hang up your dress.'

i guess she didnt forget. she hanged herself that night...we're guessing around 3 in the morning.

now you may be thinking 'you're so calm about this nail...wtf?' let me assure you im not. almost the entire day i was in an awestruck mode...like it was all some sort of practical joke...it hadnt happened. until i got home from the friends house. i burst out crying for an hour and a half. im so exhausted now it hurts. i cant believe shes actually gone...but she is. i liked her most of last year...and i always thought shed be there in french class. they way she smiled all the time...the way she found a way to giggle at pretty much everything...and im never gunna hear her cute little giggle anymore. i hardly even knew her...and i miss her already

rest in peace kristina...we will always love and never forget you.

 

oh yes...this is probably the creepiest thing about it. every year our school has a huge holiday collage, where all the music groups and a few soloists and groups play christmas music for a concert. its usually 2-3 hours long a concert. its now 2 shows instead of 1...because it gets so crammed (and we have no small auditorium for a high school...a thousand or two thousand ppl) and its still too big...we may go to three shows next year. well...it seems that three recent deaths have been caused around this time...and theres an eerie link between the three...then many between pairs of the three.

four years ago...Brandy Hudkins was killed in the fall of her sophomore year in a car accident. her birthday was december 4th. it was the Choirs first time singing this song called 'We Will Remember Them'...some eerie song about people who have died. they didnt sing it at the holiday collage because they sang something else to honor brandy.

last year...Alexis Lyford-Stogic was also killed in a car accident coming home from a rehersal after school for the holiday collage...4 days after Brandys would be 18th birthday. alexis was a sophomore. the choir was going to sing We Will Remember Them the next week at the holiday collage, the first time singing it since the year brandy died. they didnt. instead they sang Alexis' favorite christmas carol, Silent Night.

this morning...Kristina Calco committed suicide, on brandys would be 19th birthday. she was...and still is...a sophomore. the choir was meant to sing We Will Remember Them in two weeks at the holiday collage. they arent going to.

coincidence? i think not.

 

Im sorry for you man. I hope that you can cope with this well and my condolences. You know that all of us at HCF got your back in your time of need.

 

WOW, that was alot of reading, man I don't know what to say

to make a long story short, I sorta knew Victoria and Amanda, but not her sister, well one night I was other another friends, but was supposed(not have to, but I was gonna head over that way) to be by Victoria's and Amanda's house, and that night they went out, and crashed, and Catherine died, I didn't even know her, but I just couldn't believe it.

I guess if there is any positive to this, she's looking over you now, nail

I try to do whatever I can for my friends, weather(sp) it's dropping a line on myspace saying, what's new, or anything, I try and do it, cause before you know it... it could be to late

I was in a mental health hospital for family issues, and I saw some much there. I mean, I saw kids become sucidal because they lost parents, kids become addicted to pot, cause of issues, and it's just a shame that our youth has to live like this...

I try not to(I need to work more) but calling someone a faggit, could make them loose it on the inside and do something, like suicde.

I know we're not friends much, Nail, but my aim is hookedonphonix91 if ya needa vent or someone to talk to

best of luck man

 

Man i can't imagine how you must be feeling right now, with the sudden loss of someone you knew even if you weren't very close to them. the loss of someone you knoo is always painful. but remember don't morn the loss of a loved one, just be happy people like them exsist. and the thing with the choir and the deaths that is just plain freeky.[&:]

And Nail you know that we are all here for you...we will be through the hard and the good. man i wish that everyone didn't live like 1000 miles apart.

 

And Nail you know that we are all here for you...we will be through the hard and the good. man i wish that everyone didn't live like 1000 miles apart.


I deff. fell ya and hear ya there!

 

thanks guys...im really thankful for the support. its weird...im more depressed over her than i was over either of my grandpas or my grandma...i dont know why...i just am

 

Wow, that's an incredible story. I'm really sorry for your loss, and if you ever need any help or anything my aim is BigBlob202.

 

When a death is unexpected it affects you much more profoundly. I'm still not over my dog dying in 2000 (I found him), but was over my grandmothers' deaths within a day or so (they both had terminal illnesses).

In any case, you have all our condolences. Take it easy, it takes time. Go to the memorials and funeral if they help you at all. Think back on all the happy times and tell your friends how much you love them and care about them. A lot of kids commit suicide because they simply think that no one cares about them. I've come damn close.

 

i went to a funeral this weekend. my old college roommate's father died suddenly. I didn't realize he was as old as he was.

I tried not to cry (considering im 36) but couldn't help tearing up midway through the ceremony.

and when the honor guard fired 21 rounds into the air, I lost it.

Ever see a grown man cry in the back of a funeral home? it's not pretty.

Just goes to show you that everybody needs to live life like it's your last day...